Rutile holds up a hand, both to acknowledge and dismiss the Fool's sympathy. "It hardly matters. I think they were lost to me long before that, both here and back home. I..." They shake their head.

Gems do not cry; they are not capable of it. But hairline fractures appear in Rutile's face, only partly hidden by their hands. Part of them dearly wants to tell the Fool all that happened, but a larger part is too ashamed to consider it.

"I think we were apart for too long," they say finally. "Padparadscha even told me so; it was one of the last things they said to me. I didn't think that they had changed so much. Or that I had. I was so attentive, I knew everything about them, everything... but it must not have been enough."