"That's why I can't stand it," Aly mumbles. "It's cowardice. Staying here's going to...it'll tear me apart, I can't do anything about it, I can't try and fix it or put the pieces back together as much as I can. It won't work. All I can do is...sit here and wait and it'll kill me!"

At the offer to clean her up, she pulls back and shakes her head vigorously. "No, I can't, I...there's blood on my hands, I have to l..." She swallows hard. "Listen. I've killed before, but I'm not a murderer. Not in battle, that doesn't make you a...but now I'm just as good as one, even if I didn't wield the knife myself. It's my fault, this is..."

'On the contrary, Your Majesty. It pleases me.' The grin she'd had to hold back so her teeth didn't become fangs and rip that bitch's throat out for revenge, even though that'd kill her, too. I have to play my part, otherwise it was all for nothing. I won't waste that. The scream she'd let out upon waking up. The knowledge that her own hands had wrought the weapon that had struck the killing blow on the wrong person...

Tears are streaming down her face now. She pretends not to notice. "I have to live with this," she says, and indicates the blood on her face.