ioduanlogs | A Good For Nothin' Louse

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A Good For Nothin' Louse

Characters: Captain Bastien & Whomever joins him! (Open)
Date: All throughout May
Location: Random locations in Aifaran
Situation: Doing what pirates do best? ~~Looting & pillaging!~~ Causing trouble!
Warnings/Rating: PG-14, mentions of blood, nudity & crime

I. ᴛʀᴀᴘᴘᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴀ ɴᴇᴛ

"Help!"

A shrill cry shatters the fragile peace of the bay once poor Bastien got caught in that net. He forgo his pirate ways today in order to enjoy a soothing dip in the sea. It's been awhile since Bastien gotten to enjoy life as a merman. For too long he pretended to be human and even longer so spent too many days on land. He was itching for the chance to spread his fins. However, Bastien ended up getting trapped within this fishing net all thanks to his gluttony.

"Help me! Help me, please!" He yells pathetically while trying to break free. A faint trickle of blood slithers in between his turquoise scales as he keeps trashing about in the water. That absurdly long hair of his is tangled within the net too. The more he moves, the tighter the net becomes. This must belong to a commercial fisherman since its meant to gather a large quantity of fish. Too bad for Bastien that the net circled around him when he attempted to steal a tasty trout.

"HELLPPPPPPP!!!"

----

II. ʀᴇᴀᴄʜ ғᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ sᴋɪᴇs

It all happens so fast!

One moment you're walking down the street minding your own business browsing the wares and the next you're getting yanked by the arm into a nearby alleyway. It happens too fast. There's barely a moment to catch your breath before some bloke armed with a sword presses the blade against your neck. "Move and I'll run you through!" Bastien growls menacingly as he grips the hilt of his blade. If you're a fan of swords or even a historian, you might notice that the sword in question is a French rapier hailing from the 18th century. If not? It's just a fancy sword, a little too fancy for this pretty boy pirate. Maybe he stole it from someone?

Well, that's a story for another day.

"Empty your pockets, mate." Bastien smirks impishly as he steps back a little. That fancy sword of his is still awfully close to your neck. "I want all your valuables and then some. Either part with them now or part with them in death."

The pirate states in a rather arrogant tone.

"Your choice."

----

III. ʏᴇ ᴏʟᴅᴇ ᴡᴀᴛᴇʀɪɴɢ ʜᴏʟᴇ

You know, sometimes a refreshing glass of wine is needed.

Sipping on a glass of red as the evening rolls in isn't a bad idea if done at home. There's a special place in hell for boozers who bring wine into a quaint little café like this. Blame the "Fool" for introducing Die Rosa Tulpe to Bastien. The pirate visited once before and fell in love with it. That explains why he's using this café as his own personal den as he tries to recruit a new gang while enjoying his wine.

"You, boy." He gestures to some fella who was just wandering past. Just another patron. "Want to make some riches, lad?" Bastien asks as he tilts his tricorn hat to the side in a failed attempt to look threatening. "If you got the stones for it, a pirate's life is the way to go." He suggests with a chuckle as he sips his wine. The Frenchman takes a moment to enjoy the sweet aftertaste of this brilliant brew before landing his offer. Wine as good as this must be savored slowly.

"I'm lookin' for a new crew, lad. Care to join?"

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With her vision still recovering from whatever affliction she had faced earlier in the month, Valdis wasn't entirely prepared to be drug into a nearby alleyway. She moved with it, unconcerned as the blade pressed against her throat.

"I'm afraid you've threatened the wrong woman," Valdis replied, her tone cool, collected and even amused.

She drew her angelic blade with more speed than any human could muster, knocking his rapier aside and directing the tip of her sword at his throat. Revelations glowed brightly in her grip, the red gem in the hilt flashing in time with her heartbeat.

"And even if you managed to kill me with your paltry skill," she smiled, her emerald eyes icy, "I don't stay dead."

Uh oh.

Bastien didn't quite expect all that. He figured the little woman would be too startled to retaliate. Like a normal woman, you know? The pirate didn't figure he would find himself at the opposite end of a sword. So when she suddenly unsheathes this angelic looking holy sword out of nowhere, Bastien is taken by surprise. He didn't quite think of any contingency plans if such a problem was to arrive. Bastien just thought this would be an easy enough mugging.

He was quite wrong.

"Whoa!" Bastien nearly screams once that dangerous looking sword pokes at his throat. He lowers his sword slowly with eyes dilated in absolute fear. "Don't kill me! Don't kill me!" The pirate pleads once he swears his life is flashing before his eyes.

Edited 2018-05-11 03:27 (UTC)

Unfortunately, Bastien's proposition caught the attention of one of the employees of Dia Rosa Tulpa, who really didn't have time for this guy's bullshit.

"Look, I dunno if you're trying to reenact a medieval scene or something, but can you please refrain from bothering the customers?" Leo said, as politely as he could manage. He's seen some strange things, but they usually weren't wearing period costume and drinking wine in a cafe.

Valdis arched a brow, amusement filling her eyes, "I can see that you aren't nearly as intimidating as you try to pretend to be."

His fear was evident in his essence, tone and physicality, how pathetic. She lowered the tip of her sword from his throat, but didn't let her guard down. Examining him with a critical eye. Not human, she could tell from his soul, though as to what he was, she didn't have anything to compare to.

"I'm not going to kill you," she said, "Appearances can be quite deceiving, as you have just learned."

She sheathed her sword, settling back with her arms crossed, "You should know that I'm a member of the Sentry as well, robbing an officer of the law is either very bold, or very stupid, perhaps try to observe your targets instead of picking them at random."

Bastien does look like some kind of roleplayer, doesn't he? Too bad he isn't. The pirate let's out an annoyed hiss as he shoots a glare at the boy. "Mind your own damn business, you fleabitten bilge rat!" Bastien nearly shouts as he slams his fist loudly against the table. The whole effect would've made him seem intimidating if he didn't wince right afterwards. That actually kind of hurt.

"You done scared my recruit off!" Bastien huffs as he gestures towards the retreating patron. "I almost snagged me a new first mate."

Edited 2018-05-11 03:57 (UTC)

Ouch. Bastien's pride took a tremendous blow with that first comment. Is she questioning his manliness? Certainly seems like it and that wins a frown. "I'm the Devilfish of the Mediterranean. I can assure you that I'm quite threatening..." He pauses briefly. "Sometimes." The pirate let's out an awkward cough. Bastien is quite aware that he isn't threatening like some other men but he tries to make up for it by seeming larger than life. Although, it doesn't help that he's just an inch taller than the average woman and lean to boot.

"Appearances are deceiving but you're an outright lie." He says with an annoyed huff once the woman spares his life. "It would be my luck to pluck the one rose that has thorns." Bastien sighs quietly as he wipes the sweat pff his brown. He's grateful to be alive.

"Eh!?!" Bastien's eyes widen some once he hears that sentry bit. "You're a bloomin' guard?!"

Edited 2018-05-11 04:11 (UTC)

Leo did slightly jump at the guy pounding his fist against the table, but unfortunately he was actually getting used to people not being loud assholes for once. Some good that did him.

He just loved customer service. "It just looked like you were bothering the poor man from my angle. Can you PLEASE, just like...order something and stop bothering other people? They're just here to enjoy the peace and quiet."

The man wasn't wrong about her being a lie, her secrets were far darker than her appearance would tell. Valdis continued to watch him, ready to cut him off should he try to escape or make another move, though she appeared perfectly relaxed.

"Well, Devilfish of the Mediterranean," she laughed, "I hate to break it to you, but all roses have thorns, mine are just sharper than most."

The gem in the hilt of her sword continued to pulse, the presence of the blade a familiar and soothing one and she rested her hand on the hilt.

"I am many things to many people," she replied, her expression coy, "But, yes, you could call me a guard."

The look upon Bastien's face turns threatening. "Are you tryin' to boss me around, midget?" He asks as he slowly rises out of his seat. "Cause I don't take kindly to threats." In just a second, the annoying pirate storms over towards the lad and lunges for him in an attempt to yank him by the collar.

"I'm Captain Bastien Courbis, lad." He introduces with a slight snarl. "Diables de mer Méditerranéens, the Devilfish of the Mediterranean, the Fiercest man of the Seven Seas! Captain of the Red Hornet and admiral of the Red Flag Fleet!" It takes awhile to get through that many titles but Bastien quotes them all like a pro.

"I will not be disrespected by some little shite like you."

Escaping is definitely on Bastien's mind since he doesn't want to spend his evening in a jail cell. However, he doubts he could take her in a battle. The woman is clearly faster than him and probably a tad stronger. Out of all the wenches he could've picked to rob, he gets this one. This woman will run him through if he isn't careful. Bastien makes sure there's ample distance between them.

"Is that right, luv?" The pirate questions as he idly steps towards the left. "I didn't know that but I'll remember it for next time." Bastien states as he suddenly sashays towards the right. He's up to something judging from the mischief in his gaze.

"Well, mademoiselle, do you have a name?" Bastien asks as he inches two steps backwards.

Edited 2018-05-11 05:27 (UTC)

Leo started to think that maybe confrontation was a bad idea around the time Bastien's facial expression changed, and the grabbing at the collar certainly cemented that. Leo was worried about the potential trouble he'd cause for everyone else in the cafe, but the instant the pirate grabbed at him, Valdis' training kicked in and he was grabbing at and hopefully twisting the man's arm, attempting to drive him back into the table.

"Don't manhandle me, you drunk bastard!!" Leo yelled, just in case the ruckus wasn't obvious enough yet.

Drunk bastard?! But he's not even drunk! Maybe pleasantly buzzed but definitely not drunk enough yet. Although, none of that seems to matter once that brat catches him off guard. "Hey---Ow!" Bastien hisses when that little twerp twists his arm behind him.

"Lemme go, dammit!" The pirate trashes violently as he tries to yank his pistol off his belt with his free hand. "I'll shoot you full of holes, I swear!" He tries to aim the gun at the boy but the angle is off when he shoots. Instead of killing anyone, he shatters the window.

The gunshot sent the customers scattering and the employees ducking for cover.

Klaus had been in the greenhouse when he heard the shot, and barreled full speed into the cafe. The cute green apron with a little yellow chick and a pink tulip did very little to lessen the looming, 300 pound monstrosity that was an angry Klaus Von Reinherz. Aifaran had not softened his instincts in any respect - it took him only a moment to see where the source of the commotion was, and what he saw made his blood run cold.

Leo was in trouble and the man at the table had a gun.

Deescalation was normally the rule of the day, but Klaus was a bit stupid when it came to Leo's safety, and so Klaus didn't even say a word. It was straight to using his blood arts.

The macabre cross made from solid blood seemed to erupt upwards from the ground towards the gun in an effort to disarm the pirate, while Klaus moved forward, reaching for Leo.

"Jesus fuck," was all Leo managed to say as the gun fired past him. He legit thought this guy was a cosplayer and the gun was real? Leo turned around to frantically wave out any other patrons who hadn't already (wisely) fled, and turned back only to see Klaus there and using his blood arts.

"Klaus, what are you doing?? He yelled, jumping behind his boss because to be honest, he was kind of scared of bullets. "You'll kill him like that!"

"Mon dieu." A hint of surprise escapes Bastien once the shot goes off. He expected the powder to still be wet thanks to earlier but it's apparently dry. The pirate lingers there for a moment moderately stunned before snapping out of it. "See, brat! That could've been your head---" He trails off suddenly when some red creepy looking cross appears out of thin air.

Bastien let's out a terrified gasp once the bloody cross knocks his pistol out of his hand. Without thinking, Bastien staggers backwards and draws his sword. "What in the blazes was that?!" He yells once some enormous looking fella storms over.

"Oh my god." He mutters this time in English as the big man yanks the boy back. "It's a giant! A bonafide giant!" Did the kid summon this monster?! Seems like it.

Valdis still watched his movements with pure amusement on her fair features. The man obviously recognized his grave error in attempting to rob her. Her awareness of his fidgeting didn't compromise the fact that she knew he was going to try to run. His question was clearly a cover, yet she would answer it, with a few twists.

"Valdis, Dronning av Hundr, shattered angel, wielder of the divine blade Revelations, and Goddess of Chaos." She lifted her chin and a breath of air passed through the alley as she summoned her ka.

If Bastien were to look behind him, he would see a massive, white wolf wearing golden armor. Her green eyes the same color as the woman's in front of him.

"I do hope you weren't planning on leaving our little chat before it has reached it's conclusion," Valdis continued, "I'd hate to have to arrest you for threatening an officer of the law with death."

A tense grin settles upon his lips as he fidgets about. While he doesn't doubt that Valdis knows he's up to something, Bastien doubts the woman noticed the fire escape just above. All that fidgeting is just him trying to align himself under the fire escape. He means to jump up and grab the end of that ladder before racing up towards the roof. It's a fine plan since Valdis hasn't noticed yet but it's a risky one.

"The Shattered Angel, eh?" He muses with fake interest. "How can you be both an angel and a goddess, hm? Don't you have to pick, luv?" Bastien asks as he inches once towards the right. Success! He's directly under the fire escape. This is good. Bastien might be able to escape---wait, what in the hell?!

As soon as Bastien turns around, he finds himself face to maw with some overgrown white wolf in fancy armor. He does what any normal pirate would do in this precarious situation. He screams. "ARGH! WOLF!" Bastien backs away quickly in fear of getting bitten. "Wolves! I hate wolves!" Not entirely true but he never seen a wolf like that before.

The poor pirate scrambles up against the wall in pure terror. Bastien swears he can hear his heart drumming within his ears. "What?! I wasn't leavin' anytime soon! Of course not. Hahaha..."

Lies.

Edited 2018-05-11 22:52 (UTC)

"Titles aren't necessarily accurate," Valdis replied, "I was never a real goddess, and I am no longer anything resembling an angel."

Long lifetime experience taught her that people with the idea of flight often looked for unexpected paths. Cutting off both ends of the alley meant that there was only one way out. Up. Admittedly, that particular direction was usually difficult to accomplish unless one could fly. Luckily, it seemed that the pirate did not possess that ability, and Hila successfully countered the other option in that direction.

"Oh, good," She said, her smile taking on a more pleasant edge. The lie did not go unnoticed, but it was best to pretend otherwise if it put him at ease. "I've introduced myself, it's usually polite to give your name in return."

That comment about her no longer being angelic wins a sarcastic snort. "Oh, you don't say. I wonder why." Bastien gives her an annoyed glare before that angry wolf of hers starts growling. "Easy there, beastie!" He laughs nervously before sparing Valdis another glance.

So, she officially has him cornered with no means to escape. Charming. Seems like he'll be spending a night in jail after all. That is if she decides to cuff him. Clearly Valdis can overpower him in a fair fight. She is a former angel, no? Just by speed alone, she would kill him faster than he can draw his sword. It's an uneven match, a little too uneven for his liking. In hopes of keeping his pretty little head attached to his neck, Bastien metaphorically waves the white flag and surrenders.

"Fine." He sulks a little as he leans against the wall behind him. "The name's Bastien, luv. Captain Bastien Courbis of the dreaded Red Hornet, Admiral of the Red Flag Fleet and the Pirate Lord of the Mediterranean." Bastien gives a slight bow as he takes off his hat.

"See? I have my own titles."

Edited 2018-05-12 22:22 (UTC)

Valdis flinched at his sarcasm regarding her lack of angelic qualities. A beautiful lie she might be, but the lie had never been of her own creation. The man's titles were almost lost in the pain of what she couldn't remember. A sudden, violent snarl drew her attention back. Hila slammed into the man as he bowed, knocking him to the ground and pinning him with one large paw, fury in her green eyes.

Your tongue will be your death, the wolf snarled, her voice in both their heads.

"Hila," Valdis snapped, and the wolf lifted her head, growled again and then backed off, allowing Valdis to approach.

"It seems that you now owe me your life," she said, her tone icy, "My ka, one of the six parts of my soul, is apparently not pleased with your quips. It's unbecoming of a Lord to insult a Lady in such a manner, don't you agree?"

Edited 2018-05-12 23:03 (UTC)

Bastien somewhat noticed that vacant look that crossed her face. It's an unlikely expression on Valdis, a curious one. He was about to question her until the bloody damn wolf pounced on him. As soon as he hit the ground, Bastien found himself staring into the beast's jaws again. "I-It talks?!" The disbelief in his tone takes a step back to the blatant fear in his voice. Bastien has no idea what he said to trigger this but he regrets it. He regrets it tenfold.

"Now, now!" Bastien tries to push that massive paw off his chest but he can't. He simply can't. The wolf has him thoroughly pinned. Even with his strength, he can't shake it off. "M-My mother always said my mouth would get me in trouble but not like this!" Bastien manages to croak out. He's shaking like a leaf at this point, honestly dreading what's to come next. Bastien was certain that he was going to die until Valdis calls the wolf off.

A relieved sigh escapes him. Now able to breathe again, the pirate sits up slowly as he regards Valdis with a sheepish smile. This woman is a little too dangerous for his liking. Valdis makes the women in Tortuga look like kittens. "Agreed!" He quickly complies as he hesitantly rises to his feet.

"No more sass from me, luv."

Hila chuffed, but took several steps backward. Valdis can tell the ka is pleased with herself, though the white wolf was normally the one countering Valdis. The man's insult, however, impacted Hila as much as it did Valdis. Any trace of uncertainty and hurt was gone by the time Bastien regained his feet. In some ways, he reminded her of another foolish individual, though that person had lacked fear, even when they should have possessed it.

"Good," She nodded at him, flashing him a disarming smile, not that she suspected it would work, "Were you really a pirate captain?"

Bastien gives the mean beastie a worried glance before putting up airs again. A sound of distaste escapes him as he brushes his fingers through his hair. He really ought to trim it but Bastien never liked getting a haircut. Between the fact most men want to slit his throat or behead him, Bastien simply doesn't trust anyone with his hair. He's a pirate. Trouble follows him like second skin.

"Oui." He mutters in French as he pretends to seem disinterested. Kind of hard to be disinterested in a pretty woman no matter the circumstances. Bastien gives Valdis a quick look before turning his gaze upward. He will NOT be killed for checking her out.

"I was a captain until the King's Navy shot me down at sea." Bastien mutters bitterly as he keeps nervously combing his fingers through his hair. "They...they caught us by surprise when leavin' the port. The Red Hornet was a fast ship only second to the legendary Black Pearl but no one seen that ship for a decade now." He pauses briefly as a thought comes to mind.

"That means we were the fastest!" The realization dawns on him. "The Pearl be damned! My ship is the fastest of the Seven Seas."

Edited 2018-05-12 23:59 (UTC)

Bastien's attempts to not look at her didn't go unnoticed. Luckily, Hila didn't care as long as Valdis didn't, and Valdis was used to men looking. Kind of hard to avoid it, though this man was at least enough of a gentleman to try, out of fear or not.

"If your ship was shot down, then technically it is no longer the fastest ship," Valdis pointed out, "But if you were skilled enough to be a captain, why don't you join the Sentry's naval division? It probably pays better than attempting to rob unsuspecting women."

It definitely paid better, especially since one was less likely to risk being arrested actually working for money as opposed to stealing it.

Valdis is pretty enough to be some rich nobleman's wife. She has that ethereal charm about her and that dainty sort of physic that lies about her youth. She's real ladylike in appearance despite being surlier than an ornery sea serpent when angered. Bastien's gaze strays to her time and time again as they speak. He seen other pretty women before but nobody quite like Valdis here. She's really out his league by a thousand leagues and then some but he can appreciate from afar.

"Gee, thanks for reminding me." He mutters under his breath with a hint of sarcasm. "I just hope that most of my men escaped with their limbs intact. I'll be lookin' for them if I ever reach familiar tides." Bastien let's out a frustrated sigh. Will he ever get back home? Probably never. Bastien didn't have much of a home to return to away. He never did. The pirate wasn't born with a silver spoon within his mouth unlike some people.

He was born on a pirate ship.

"You're suggestion that the Sentry would hire a louse like me?" Bastien questions with an arched brow. "Well, maybe. I mean I certainly don't plan on harrassin' anymore pretty ladies after this experience." He smiles weakly at Valdis. For once, he states the truth. "Robbery isn't my style. I like robbing banks or looting cargo more. More fun, you know?" Of course she doesn't but he asks anyway.

"But a steady salary would be nice." He brings his hand down from his hair and let's out a thoughtful hum. "I used to be a privateer for a time after savin' Gustavia." Bastien gives Valdis and her wolf another glance. "Ever heard of the port city of Gustavia? It's the capital city of Saint-Barthélemy, a French colony. Lovely place."

Edited 2018-05-13 01:16 (UTC)

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A Good For Nothin' Louse

II | Forward Dated slightly

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